No two hotels can promise the same level of experience. In Vegas, even bargain hunters know that there are those worth returning to, and others that are like the bronze trophy in a three-way foot race. For every El Cortez Cabana Suites, there are a dozen or more of the "Motel Hell" variety. Now we've experienced the nightmares so you don't have to.

DOWNTOWNER HOTEL

The website for The Downtowner would have you believe that it's a delightfully-restored art-deco throwback to Sin City's golden era. In actuality, it's the carcass of an exhumed corpse that's been given a fresh coat of paint, some whimsical decorations, and a putting green (for some inexplicable reason). 

Across from the main building (formerly a low-rent apartment building) is an annex that resembles a detention center for wayward teens. Both structures are supplied with spartan furnishings that even an IKEA staffer would call "cheap". A depressing tone is set the moment you arrive at their reservation desk, which resembles an inner-city STD clinic. But don't be concerned if your spirits need a lift, as the lobby doubles as a bar. So, you can be adequately cross-eyed before entering your personal slice of off-Fremont paradise. Some rooms have the added bonus of bullet holes in the walls.

When a hotel or motel devotes more web space to surrounding businesses than their own rooms and services, consider that a warning sign. There may be plenty to do in downtown Las Vegas, but staying at The Downtowner should NOT be one of those things. You can check in, but you'll want to check out...immediately. Run, Forrest....run!!! (Bonus demerit - $20/day "amenity fee")

Yelp review 7/9/21: "They have no running AC which made it unbearable in the summer heat. Their fans were very loud so it was very difficult to sleep at night. Their housekeeping never cleaned our room during our lengthy stay. Avoid if you want a comfortable and professional stay."

Guest photo - wall hole plugged with toilet paper...

Guest photo - wall hole plugged with toilet paper...


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